Problem 3
by EmilieCW-DXfan0119
Summary: Yup, another one :


**Hiya, yup, another one shot about AC. I think this one is more…cracked and random?…well, let's see! Here we goes…**

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**Walking in the streets of Damascus, a woman near Altair drops her jar on the ground when he passed near her, but did not touch her.**

**Woman: **You idiot! See what you did? Because of you, my jar is broken!

**Altair: **What the heck? I didn't even touch you!

**Woman: **Then, why did I drop it huh? Explain!

**Altair: **Well, hum…*thinking*…ask them! They are the one who made this game. *points at Ubisoft's team* Cause I really have no idea.

**Woman**: *looks around* What? Who? *thinking: he must be crazy…yeah.*

**Altair**: *talking to the team* You're trying to get me into trouble don't you? Don't give me those innocent faces, you know damn well what I'm talking about! *keeps on arguing*

**Guard#1**: *sight* It's the same guy who talked with his horse not too long ago. Now he talks to himself…wasn't he supposed to be cured from his mental problem?

**Guard#2**: He was supposed to…guess he'll need another sojourn in the asylum…

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In the blue screen thingy…

**Electronic voice: ***speech *

**Altair**: Huh? Who said that? *looks around only to see no one*

**Electronic voice**: *speech*

**Altair:** *drops in a foetal position* Nooo, I'm hearing voices again! I shouldn't have drink that crack water.

**Prince**: *scoff* You should consider yourself lucky. When I drink that water, I turn into a freak sand monster…PLUS I too have the voices…

**Altair: **Who the hell are you? O.o

**Prince: **Me? Well…erm…sorry, wrong game *leaves in a rush*

**Altair: **Great, now I hallucinate people too… -_-"

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Altair just finished to kill a group of nearly 20 guards.

**Altair: ***turns to the camera with a flashy smile* This as been a real blood bath, but you see, no blood stains on my robes! Wanna know why? Well, it's simple. These robes are made with a special material that prevents blood to stain your awesome white robes! And guess what? You'll never need to wash them! Unbelievable!

**Citizen: ***watching Altair talking to himself* What the heck is he doing?

**Altair: **You can order one of these for only 36 payments of 25$ ! Call at 345-765-243 and get a free assassin belt in prime! You can pay cash, by visa or any other credit card you have! Hurry and call now, this offer won't last for long**! ***flashy smile*

**Citizen**: Dude, what's a credit card?

**Altair: ***blinks*** **hum…seriously, I don't know…I don't even know why I did what I just did. O.o

**Ubisoft team: ***laughing their ass off*

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Altair fought a group of guards and the last one standing decided to surrender and run away, but the assassin wouldn't let him.

**Altair: ***keeps attacking with sword*

**Guard: ***blocks every hit by taking out sword very fast and putting it back*

**Altair: **How in the world can you block that fast? O.O

**Guard: **Well, hum…*shrugs* Dunno…

**Altair: ***Turns to Ubisoft team* Are you making fun of me again?

**Guard: **Who, me?

**Altair: **No, them! The ones who created this game!

**Guard: ***looks around to see no one else and becomes confused *Oooookaaayyy…*leaves*

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After hearing two person talking about a letter to be delivered to someone important, Altair decides to steal it. But the man turned around in suspicion and saw a white hooded man, but just shrugged and continued his walk. Then, Altair keeps following him and the guy turned around.

**Guy**: Are you done following me? Damn stalker *mumbles then resume his walking*

**Altair finally succeeded to rob the letter and the guy realizes he doesn't have the letter anymore**.

**Guy**: Damnit! Who did that? *looks around for the culprit even if the white hooded man is near, he turns away and leave, not happy at all to have lost the letter*

**Altair:** *blinks in surprise* wow, what an idiot! And they asked him to carry a letter with important information in it. Stupid templars…

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After being given a mission by his master Al Mualim, Altair rushes to the entrance gates to go to Jerusalem. But, in his rush, he accidentally bumped into one of the assassin guards assigned to patrol in the village.

**Altair: **Sorry bro, didn't mean to do that.

**Guard: ***Takes out his sword* Infidel!

**Altair: **What? Hey, chill out dude, it was an accident!

**Guard: ***walks towards Altair*

**Altair: ***sees other guards coming with their swords in hand* Guys, what's gotten into you? We're brothers! *dodges attacks* I didn't kill anyone! I just bumped into one of you.

**Guard: **Die infidel!

**Altair: **O.o *runs the hell outta here*

**(A/N: This really bugs me when it happens…each time I bump into one, he tries to kill me even if we are both assassins XD)**

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Well, hope it was good :P Review please! ^^


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